Pete LaBonne

Short shorts is the best
song in the English language
and it translates well.

But as for notions,
notions of the afterlife,
you can forget it.

Afterlife is just,
it’s all a combination
of fetal sentience
and uterine chemistry.

‘We Could Be Together’ by The Mamas & The Papas
VERSUS
‘We Gotta Get Outa This Place’ by The Four Seasons

Quite so;
Former Archeologist Mumbles Something About
Non-existence Of Mighty Xothar!
No Haiku Attack, No Alien Archfiend Enslavement Of Earthlings,
No Demonic Coercion. We’re O.K.

Devil possibly involved
in Xothar haiku take-over!

Xothar sells alien soul
to Earth Devil for enslavement
of Earthling civilization.

Earth Devil: ” It seemed like a good trade-off”
Mighty Xothar: “Fool”

Live At The Linda!
“You wanna hear how loud I usually play?”
So he turns up, and his amplifier makes a horrid buzz.
“My cord’s fucked up. I have another one in the green room.
Why don’t you all just chant ‘Pete Pete Pete Pete’ until I get back.”
We all start chanting ‘Pete Pete Pete’. Meanwhile, he tells me later,
he’s back there shotgunning Colt 45 tall boys and gets so tanked,
he stumbles into the ‘handicapped only’ restroom and pisses on
some wiring, which kills the lights and everyone starts like earnestly making out?
Andy, up in the recording room, rectifies the short, the lights come back on,
and Pete stumbles back on stage (without the cord) and announces his
first song (something, he says, he’s never “you know when you sing something
in front of other people?”) called ‘Guest Of Honor’,
So ensues the pompous horrid buzz which sounds like his rig
checked into a crack house and it’s heart literally exploded.
Lee Bogo
photo by Joseph Deuel